i'm standing here in front of my mirror in just a pair of undies, blow drying my hair, realizing that this is the first time in my whole life that ive ever stood and stared at my reflection and been happy with what I saw. never, before tonight, have i looked at my body and thought 'damn you look good'. I have to say that it is such a great feeling :) i can't thank the rec center enough for it

I can't sleep. I'm laying here on my couch rolling my eyes at this infomercial thats guaranteeing a "total body makeover" without stepping foot inside of a gym, in 6 weeks guaranteed. Apparently this chick lost 80 lbs and 86 inches and the weight is "literally melting off". YEAH RIGHT. I feel bad for all the people out there that buy into this crap. That's all it is, a bunch of crap.

I'm back to keeping track of everything I put in my mouth. Seriously, check out myfitnesspal.com . Keeping track of my food intake definitely makes a HUGE difference in how many calories I eat. When I don't do this, it is way too easy for me to pretend like I didn't just eat something bad for me. Adding something to my daily food log and being forced to look at the nutrition facts is when I often decide that my butt really doesn't need a second  serving of something.  

You are what you eat !

The past two weeks have been insane for me (if you couldn’t tell from my lack of blog posts). School definitely kicked my butt this quarter… I will be SO glad when summer break is finally here! Despite my crazy schedule I have managed to stay pretty consistent with my workouts. Speaking of consistency, I have to say that this is one of my biggest accomplishments so far; making trips to the gym a normal part of my day. I enjoy going to the gym, actually look forward to it now – this is something I never thought would be possible. In fact, I wish that all I had to do with my life is workout and sit in the sauna with my friends. My biggest struggle remains my diet; I have to say that it is the hardest aspect of weight loss and is definitely tougher than the workouts. It is so difficult to eat healthy as we are surrounded by junk food, and let’s face it, it’s much more convenient for someone else to make your food for you. Although I’m not very familiar with the science behind it, I’ve heard that junk food is like a drug. That junk food triggers a certain pathway in the brain causing us to want more of it. From my own experience I have to agree with this theory. It seems although when I eat really well for a week or so, eating mainly fruits, vegetables, and natural unprocessed foods, I stop craving sugar and other “bad for you” foods. I start to prefer the taste of fruit over gummy bears and chips. It’s when I give in and eat badly for a day or two that I seem to hit this slippery downward slide of more unhealthy eating. I think that finding some type of a balance between eating good and bad food is key, but even five, nearly six months in to this journey, I am still struggling to find this. I’ve come to realize that this is okay though and that healthy eating is not a change that can be made over night. I’ve been eating “bad for you foods” for the past twenty years of my life, obviously it is going to take a bit of time for my taste buds to adjust. I met with a new dietitian, Marta Graham, and she had a lot of interesting information to share with me. She spoke a lot with me about the “science” behind eating and how insulin, glucose, and cortisol levels affect fat storage and hunger. Marta emphasized the importance of regulating blood sugar levels by doing things such as eating breakfast EVERY day. Marta also suggested I increase my protein intake and lower my carbohydrate intake and not to worry AS much about calories and fat. I've yet to put this into practice though; my diet has been horrible over the past two weeks and has consisted of cake, cookies and very few vegetables. As a result, I continue to be stuck at 129 lbs and my % body fat isn't budging. It’s time to get my crap together - bathing suit season is right around the corner!!

PS. I’ve had some requests for tips… I’m working on putting together a list as well as some info about what my workouts are looking like these days without Ashlee facilitating them :( I miss her SO much!!!   

Omgoodness!! The past couple of weeks have been so crazy busy. As soon as I get home from work tonight blogging and answering questions will be my number one priority! I hope everyone has a great workout today!

im fighting a sugar craving . im not going to give in

Today at 1 o'clock I am meeting with Marta Graham to use my last dietitian session. I am really excited to see what she has to say! In the few emails we have exchanged I explained the difficulties ive been having with my junk food binges and getting my % body fat down. Marta says she is "confident" that she can help me :) Ill let you know how it goes!!